I have spent time with many people in the past few days. One, who leans toward racial and ethnic slurs, dissatifaction with others, and a need to be the center of attention, all the while wearing a mantle of Christianity. I find that my worst self comes out in this person's presence. Because I am called to love everyone, I will, but I like neither her nor myself when I am with her. Please do not panic that I am in some way going to hurt her feelings by mentioning her in this way. She does not use a computer, and, history would tell me, that even if I used her name she would never recognize herself.. But, I will have sinned in a most extravagant way if I allow my interactions with her to overshadow all the many mercies the Lord graciously rained upon me during the time of her visit.
Friday, I had a walking tour with wonderful students, wonderful teachers, and wonderful parents. A little mercy for my day. I texted Mr. Lincoln yesterday when I finished my tour..."I love my job!!!"...and I do not have a smart phone, so it took a lot of button pushing to put those 3 exclamation points. Every day this time of year, I spend my mornings sharing stories of history, enjoying the beautiful (and not so lovely at times) weather, interacting with precious 4th graders, and I get paid for it. I am so very blessed. When I begrudgingly headed home Friday to greet our weekend guest, I found MP and Simeon at my house. MP let me take Simeon from the crib and hold him. Aaaaaaaaaah, sweet peace.
I had for several days been looking forward to Saturday. MP, Sheri, and I, among others, were invited to a brunch at the home of one of my favorite people. I love going to her home. She is genuinely a Southern lady who entertains with ease and sweetness and warmth. There are several of us old Otter Creekers who have daughters and daughters-in-law expecting babies this spring. Our hostess has a daughter expecting her fourth next month. As I sat in that gracious home surrounded by women I love, both young and old, I was overcome with joy in their presence. One friend, whose daughter-in-law was there, big with child, kept saying "this is where our treasure is." Oh, how I love that friend. What words of truth she spoke. The moms shared scriptures of encouragement that will be compiled for those young mothers. I pray each of them is able to be bathed in the blessings of those ancient words. We prayed over them. We prayed over the two babies there. One of them rested in the arms of her adoptive mother. They are caught in a court battle. It is scary. We pray with confidence that they will not be separated. I left there refreshed and renewed and grateful that I live in this time and in this place with these people.
Sunday, we had prayer stations during the service. Mr. Lincoln and I, along with many others, were to oversee one of these stations. This sort of thing is out of my comfort level. I do not like being in front of everyone. Oh, I have come into service in a cardboard car making vroom, vroom noises. I have stood in front of the entire church dressed as a robot in a box with flashing Christmas lights, a funnel on my head, foil-covered shoe boxes on my feet and duct work on my arms and legs. I have come in with a big pot and wooden spoon with one of my favorite partners in crime as she sang "hot chili...." to promote a chili cookoff. I have danced the tango with Mr. Lincoln in front of the congregation while the praise team hummed to promote a marriage seminar weekend. If you are not church of Christ, you haven't a clue what heresy that was....humming AND dancing. Shocking!!! But, I really do not like being in front in a serious role.
I may not like it, but if one of our ministers asks me to do it, I will. I realize the purpose is not my being seen or not being seen. It is about edifying our church family. Mr. Lincoln signed us up for the balcony during first service. Our reasoning was that in the balcony, we would not be in front. But, I think God had another reason, for as we entered the balcony, I saw one of my dearest friends. Her distress was evident. I leaned over to hug her. She hugged me back, and in her tears she asked me to pray with her. We prayed for her precious daughter; a daughter who is hurting. I do not think we ever see the heart of God quite as clearly as when we agonize over our children. We hurt when our children hurt. I believe God aches for us as He watches us struggle. There are those who would ask, "then, why doesn't he do something about it?" I do not have an answer, I just know what I believe. And, so, we prayed. My friend and I. I think I was put in that balcony for her and for myself. She might not have been as free to share her concerns with someone else. She knows I love her daughter, and her. I hope she knows that I do not judge her parenting nor the goodness of her child. Stuff happens. People hurt and try to stop the pain in myriad ways. It is not mine to judge. It is mine to love and care for and join in prayer.
Because the balcony is not open during second service, Mr. Lincoln and I stationed ourselves in the back of the sanctuary. We prayed for a woman in recovery. She is struggling. My prayer was a stumbling, bumbling plea. No eloquence there. I hope she did not feel dismayed that she stopped by us. We told her not to hesitate to ask for help any time. I continue to pray for her. Mr. Lincoln passed her name and the fact of her struggle to the leader of our recovery ministry. A longtime friend had the grace to come to us and tell us that she wanted us to pray a praise for our grandsons. How dear. She also was shouting a hallelujah because her son was in church with her. She has asked the Lord repeatedly for a sign, if you will. She had a specific sign, and that was to see her son singing in church. He sang on Sunday. It is the fondest desire of parents to have their children worship by their side. It is not for appearances. For as flawed as church can be, it is family.
I look at the people I love so much, and I see the ones who are at weddings and showers and funerals. They are the ones who bring food when we are sick or grieving. They are the ones who come and say, "I want to pray prayers of praise for your grandsons." They are the ones who lie face down at the Father's feet praying for other's children. They are the ones who stand in the gap when hopelessness overcomes. They are the ones who rejoice with you when lives are redeemed.
While my weekend had its stressful moments, I would be a fool to let those overshadow all the wonderfulness of those 4 days. I read a quote by Cal Turner Sr. at Dollar General's corporate headquarters. I won't quote it exactly, but it was something along the lines of, "I never met a person from whom I could not learn something." So, I thank my weekend guest for all the lessons I have learned at her feet. I think I am a better wife, mother to adult children, mother-in-law, and grandmother from watching her. I am more grateful to my hostess on Saturday and my friends with whom I prayed on Sunday for the lessons in grace, gratitude, faith, and humility.
For today, I wish you both good and bad examples from which to learn, that your heart's fondest desire for your children will be realized, and I wish you
blessings
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