Common Denominator

I'm in a mood.  Some people call it being in a funk.  My grandmother would occasionally say, "I just feel mean today."  She did not have a mean bone in her body, but I understand what she meant.  Some people will tell you that everything is on their last nerve.  Well, I'm in a mood.  Sometimes when I get like this "He who wishes"  finds me quite entertaining, as long as he is not the object of my derision, which he seldom is.

I'm pretty sure I know the underlying reason for this mood.  I am in anticipation phase of prolonged time spent with someone who manages to always put me in a mood.  Let me rephrase that.  I am in anticipation of prolonged time spent with someone who I almost always allow to affect my mood.  I am the common denominator here...well, that person is too, but I am the one letting myself be so adversely affected.  I'm working on it, but I am not making much headway at the moment.

My first realization that I am in a mood came this morning when I pulled into Otter Creek Road on 2 wheels, and a lovely older man made the hand motion for me to slow down.  Probably, I scared him and his little dog half to death.  Normally, my reaction would be to slow down, and possibly stop and apologize and thank him for his warning.  This morning I just gave him the stink eye.  Oops, in a mood. 

Being in a mood makes me more hypocritical than usual, because I might be smiling graciously at you as you speak, all the time thinking, "will you please just be quiet!"   When someone is speaking to me and I find myself thinking that it would be impossible for me to care any less about what they are saying, I know that I am in a mood.  Generally, these people are neither particularly long-winded nor boring.  I am just in a mood.  I am the common denominator.

Do you know people who job, church, or friend hop?  Someone is always offending them, or taking advantage of them or ignoring them or, (this is my favorite) not allowing them to use their talents.  I have a lot of faults, but I can say that baling on jobs, church, or friends is not one of them.  I figure if I am unhappy in those situations and I leave looking for greener pastures, I'll just be taking my problem with me.  The common denominator is the problem, and I am the common denominator. 

So, I shall be working on my moody old self today.  I will tell myself that if my prolonged visit does make me bonkers, I am being foolish in allowing it to ruin my mood in the days leading up to it.  I will slow down.  I will try not to give people the stink eye.  I will listen intently, and offer a silent apology for wanting to box your ears just because you are talking.  I will remind myself that you are not responsible for my mood, but that I, the common denominator, am.  And, so today, I wish you a happy mood and

blessings