Ruminations From the Beach II

Different Things We Notice:

Mr. L. (as a man and his wife walk by):  "Did you see how big his feet were?
Me: "No, what I noticed was his wife walking 3 steps in front of him to avoid that cigar smoke."

Possibly Unkind Observations:

Sir, you with the big belly and man boobs, you may think you are "one sit-up away from a date with a super model" (credit to Patrick Mead for that little saying), but, trust me, it might serve you well to be kinder to your wife.

Ma'am, is it possible that you do not feel the breeze on your bare backside exposed to the entire beach as you gather shells?  That garment you have on defies the term "cover-up."

Birds:

If I were a shorebird, I would be a pelican. They just bob along in the surf in small groups. When they get hungry they take off, fly low, grab a fish, swallow it whole, then quietly kick back in the surf.  Seagulls are way too noisy, and the tiny plovers travel in packs, run so quickly their legs are literally a blur, and they have to work too hard for food.  Yep, it's a pelican's life for me.

Going to the Beach:

With a man - I have my towel, will you grab the sunscreen...I'll meet you there.

With a group of women - Do I need a jacket...a heavy or lightweight one...should I take my ball cap

or my big straw hat...have you seen my book...where did I put my sunglasses...have you seen my reading glasses...I need another towel...do you think I need 30 sunscreen or 15...are there any plastic cups, I need to take a glass of iced tea...I think I will take this chair...oh, wait a minute, I need to tee tee one more time before we go...

Returning From the Beach:

With a man:

I'm going on up to the condo.

With a group of women:

Are you cold...I don't know, are you cold...do you need to tee tee...no, do you...are you ready to go in...what time is it...is everybody ready to go in...have you seen my glasses...is this my towel or yours...is this your sunscreen...did you get your jacket...do you want the rest of your tea.............

Missing Person:

For years, I have seen the same tall, gangly gentleman walking down the beach each morning. He is from Wisconsin. He always nods or quietly says good morning. He is a Packers fan. He had an aura of sadness about him last year, but we were not on the kind of terms that made it appropriate for me to ask questions. He is not here this year. I keep hoping to see him. I wonder where he is.

Maybe more later. For today I wish you much joy and many
Blessings