Rumination from the Beach

Alone:

Mr. L had to return home yesterday. I am on hour 16 or so of 40+ hours of being on my own.  Come next Tuesday at this time, I will be on hour 12 or so of 90+ hours on my own. As I sit here in the condo looking out over the gulf eating breakfast cookies and drinking Diet Coke, Please understand I am not seeking sympathy. I just miss Mr. L.

Body Image:

I marvel at some of the men on the beach with amazingly confident body images. They just march down the beach leading with their big ol' bellies, affectionately patting them. They worked years on perfecting that look, and they are not, by golly, going to be ashamed!

Should I Really Be Left Alone?:

I really cannot remember when I have actually been "on my own."  There is always someone I can call if I need help, be it family, friend, or trusted church.  So, in anticipation of my solitude and independence, I thought about the things I probably won't do, like ride a bike because I might not be as lucky in a bike wreck as I was last year. So, no bikes. Yesterday, I turned my ankle walking on flat ground, so no walking on flat ground while alone.  Yesterday, I cut my leg on the seat in the car requiring a trip to the drugstore for band-aids. So, no car.  Yesterday, I also scraped my forearm on the bathroom cabinet door, leaving a big, sore raspberry. So, bathroom cabinets must stay closed.  Perhaps, I will not budge from this spot, look out at the gulf, eat breakfast cookies and drink Diet Coke all day.

Hair:

My hair has been commented on several times both in person and via FaceTime. Things have been said like, "did you bring a brush," which quickly morphed into "your hair could use a brush," which ended in, "maybe you should put on a hat."  Oh, and there was the FaceTime comment, "I see you are letting your hair just go natural."  It was NOT meant as a compliment, and came after I had actually used mousse, root lifter, 2 round brushes and a hair dryer.  I have very little control over my hair at home, and absolutely none at the beach. 15 seconds outside, and it is curling and frizzing in all directions.  I shall embrace it.

Social Dorkdom:

Several days ago, I was at Mr. L's office. He called in his legal assistant so I could meet her. Oh, my, Crash and Burn. After the hello, and my wishing her a happy new year, crickets.....for several minutes. I know Mr. L was proud. Why did I not use the valuable lessons I gleaned from my The Art of Small Talk book?  Why did I not ask her, as the book suggests, " if you knew you were going to die tomorrow, what would you do today?"  Not stand here and waste time in this social morass!!

Here, at the beach, we see the same people year after year. I ran into a man named Ken, who Mr. L and I call Mr. Tanned. He stopped to speak, and ask how we are doing. Do you know what I said to him, "did y'all have a nice winter? Oh, wait, this is winter."  Seriously, on January 3, I ask someone how their winter was. Why did I not just ask, "if you knew you were going to die tomorrow......"

Books I Have Read So Far:

1.  Sunset Bay by Susan Mallery-I do not recommend. 2.  Islands, by Ann Rivers Siddons- I actually think I had read it before. She really has great characters in her books, but they are haunting, and sometime can really mess with my mind. I do recommend it, for what it is worth. 3.  The Book of Ruth by Jane Hamilton. This was really good with multi layered characters. 4.