She has Alzheimer's. He takes care of her. She knows she has Alzheimer's and is sometimes apologetic for that which she cannot remember. Sometimes I forget and ask if she has plans for the day; for Mother's Day or Easter. She will seem puzzled, eyes looking up and left as if somewhere up there is the answer to my question. After a moment or two, she will flash her beautiful, sweet smile and say, "I don't know." Sometimes, she will forget where she laid her purse or will seem a bit lost looking for him.
They have hard days at times. I know this because he is honest and admits it. I cannot imagine the sadness of watching the recognition of all that which is familiar leaving the eyes of a person one loves so dearly. How difficult it must be to lose the sharing of memories.
She dresses beautifully. She has a red sequined top that sparkles in the sunlight. I always tell her that I like it because I do, but mainly because I see it as a symbol of her sparkling personality. Often, she can be seen wearing a necklace that has a beautiful rendering of her grandchildren on it. It is reminiscent of antique, hand-painted broaches. Will there be a day that she looks at that necklace and wonders just who those children are?
He is quick to laugh, and unmercifully teases me when I am, yet again, sitting on the pew in front of him on Birthday Sunday taking pictures of my grandchildren. I grew up with teasing brothers, and I consider it a sign of great affection when someone is comfortable enough to good-naturedly tease another.
They are always early to church. They are always together.
This past week, they were greeting at a side door which made it necessary for them to come in after the service had begun. They walked down the aisle, side-by-side, to the front as the congregation sang a beautiful song. Both of them tall with majestic bearing. The passing of time has not obscured the handsome groom and the beautiful bride who walked together down a different aisle many years ago. They had no way of knowing, none of us does, what "'til death do us part" meant in that moment of young love and youthful optimism. It is so inspiring, in this world of me and mine and doing what feels good and grasping for everything that can be grasped, to watch this quiet, loving keeping of vows; 'til death do us part.
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