Thursday, June 25, 2015

Wonderings

I wish I could avoid the news. I really would love to bury my head, put on my Pollyanna persona, and  ignorantly float along in the shallow waters. Frankly, I do not care for being challenged to think outside my box; to revisit my already made up mind.  Sometimes, things come along that are really hard to avoid.

Being part of a church family that I dearly love, I am particularly struck by the tragedy and loss at the Emanuel A.M.E. Church. Our congregation has lost three members since the first of the year, and it is hard. To lose nine members in one evening at the hands of a violent man, is unthinkable, and yet it happened.  As a person striving to follow Jesus, this event raises a lot of questions in my mind.  I wonder if, perhaps, it may just confirm what non-believers already think.

Certainly, had I been writing a movie script of that evening, Goodness would have prevailed, and Dylann Roof's heart would have been touched by the kindnesses shown him, moved by the scriptures read, and his soul and their lives would have been saved. But, life is not a movie script with people's thoughts and actions being manipulated by some puppet master. We are given the freedom to make our choices.

I have heard a lot said about Dylann Roof. Many are offended by statements declaring him mentally ill. I do not claim to know what was going on in his head. I will say that, I do believe that it takes a measure of mental illness to do what he did. I also agree, that there was evil at play. He admitted, himself that he killed those people because of their race. I do not know what indoctrination he had that caused him to hate people because of their color. I do not know why he thought killing was going to improve or solve anything. I do not know why violence was his action of choice. But, what I do know is that I had better be very careful in my condemnation of him, because, I believe everyone of us, given the right circumstances, is capable of heinous acts.

There have been a lot of knee-jerk responses to these events. There are those who believe all guns should be banned. I hate guns. I am not comfortable around them. I think there are many people who have been killed either by accident or in the heat of the moment who might still be alive had a gun not been so readily available. Yet, I cannot say that banning all guns is the answer. We cannot get rid of all things that could, if used incorrectly, harm us. I have no answers.

There is a great cry for the banning of the Confederate battle flag and for the removal of all things associated with Nathan Bedford Forrest. Yes, that cartoonish statue of him on I-65 is hideous. I cringe on my tours when a student, sitting on Capitol Hill by Andrew Jackson's statue says that there is a statue "just like that" on the interstate. No, please, one is art and one is, well, not. But, even in its prominent spot, it is on private property. What little I know of the late Mr. Kershaw who commissioned the statue, he seemed a bit of a nut. But, I am not ready to say that the government has the right to keep me from putting poor art on my own property, and heaven knows, I do not want legislature banning nuttiness.

That flag and Nathan Bedford Forrest are part of our history. Granted, it is a very dark and troubling time of our history, but it is equally fascinating. Depending on the source, the KKK was begun, possibly, by Nathan Bedford Forrest. Sources I read do not agree. Some say it was begun to continue the comraderie among soldiers that was forged on the battlefields. Some say it was started to protect the widows and orphans of fallen Confederate soldiers from ill treatment by reconstructionists. Some say it was begun to intimidate and control Blacks. For whatever purpose it was conceived, certainly it evolved into a hideous organization of bigotry and hatred. Is our best move to demonize Forrest, and remove his bust from the Capitol?  I do not know. I do believe that if we choose to be rid of all those in our history who at times behaved poorly and who perpetrated violence, certainly Andrew Jackson's statue needs to go. His treatment of Native Americans was abhorrent. What about Harry Truman for dropping the atomic bomb on Hiroshima?  If we wipe clean the slate of those in our past whose behavior displeases us now, how will we remember and learn and avoid?

I grew up in the 50's and 60's. There were some turbulent times.  This may be hard to believe, but I was told by trusted people that Martin Luther King Jr. was a Communist. His call for equality among all people was a frightening thought in that day and time to many good people. As the saying goes, "hindsight is 20/20."  Yes, the KKK is an evil, wicked organization. Yes, The Trail of Tears representing the displacement and death of thousands of Native Americans is a blight on our country's history. Was Hiroshima necessary to save lives?  I do not know, but I sure would have a hard time defending it to those whose lives were destroyed. I wonder,  without my having been faced with the dilemmas of those living in the times, if I am wise to pass judgment. Maybe, I would be better served to study, try to understand the times, and then commit to doing better.

I have no answers. I am no scholar. I just wonder sometimes.

Blessings


Friday, June 19, 2015

There's a Churning Deep Within Me

We sing a song at church; There's a Stirring Deep Within Me. After reading comments on FB this morning, that song came to mind, except the word "stirring" was changed to "churning."  It was not consciously changed, my mind just kept repeating the words, "there's a churning deep within me."  A second song entered my mind; Another One Bites the Dust.

There was a post on FB saying that a local church, a church many people I love attend, would be introducing an instrumental worship service to their Sunday morning offerings.  I could not believe some of the comments made on FB. I am not sure why I could not believe them, because many of the same remarks were directed at my own congregation when a similar announcement was made. Some of the same people made the same hateful remarks in regard to both churches.

First of all, let me say that I appreciate people's convictions. Our own church family lost a couple whom I dearly love and with whom I have served in many capacities because the tradition of acapella is just too important. Our church family will never be quite the same, but we will thrive as will they in their new church family. We will continue to fellowship and work together to serve in spite of our differences of opinion on this one issue. We agree on the larger issue, that The Lord is worthy of our service and we will strive to serve him by serving our fellowman as He sends and equips us.

Several people in in the FB comments expressed sadness over the decision that this church has extended an opportunity for its members to use their God given musical talents to worship Him and to serve their fellow members. I am sorry they are sad.  I may not sound it here, but I am truly sorry they are sad, but I think that sadness is misplaced. We might be better served if we were all a little sadder over the fact that we have homelessness in this most wealthy of nations, or that drug-crazed young adults have access to guns and kill people in schools, in churches, in the streets, or that there are literally thousands of people across the world who daily die for a lack of access to clean water, or there are thousands upon thousands incarcerated people languishing in prison with no hope of a
changed life, and, sadly, many of us so-called Christians respond to that fact with a glib, "they got what they deserved."

Yes, there is a churning deep within me, and, honestly, my own often lackadaisical approach to my
faith breaks my heart and contributes to the churning. There is a world watching. There is a hurting world watching how we followers of Christ are going to conduct ourselves, and Lord help us, we often, rather than enhancing His reputation, are conducting ourselves in ways that the only response we can expect is, "I don't want any of that."  We say we believe that Jesus saved the world, that God loves us without restraint. We pray "thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven."  Seriously, do we really believe there is some great debate going on in heaven as to whether songs that mention faith and God can be sung accompanied by musical instruments or not?  Seriously?  Some of us take way
too much responsibility for deciding just exactly who Jesus saved on that cross and who God truly loves.

I happen to know that this most recent church, another one to bite the dust (insert sarcasm font), just this week has sent two mission teams, one to Honduras, and one to Scotland to serve those who are in need. I bet those folks they are serving could not care less about instrumental music. I imagine they will glimpse a little bit of Jesus in the hearts of those who have come, and as God always works, those who came to serve with be even more greatly blessed.

And, I am sorry (a little) for this parting shot, but if you are going to pass judgment, please learn how to spell it.

For today, I wish us all the grace to be so busy serving that there is no room for judging, and I wish you

Blessings


Thursday, June 11, 2015

Seriously?

So, it has been an interesting morning. I have been in the tech Bermuda Triangle. No device is working properly. Even when I called my insurance company to snail mail me something that I tried to print out here, their phones went out, and when I bought a pair of shoes, the computers at the store were down. Who knew it took so much technology to accept a cash payment? Impressive that my bad tech touch has such a far reach.

When it is decided that I would first try the Apple store for help with my phone, I felt good about the decision. Better there than the Verizon store which has 2 stars out of five for customer service. My plan is to be at the Apple store when they open at 10:00 on the dot. That would have worked brilliantly had I not hit that parked car in the garage. Great!  I check for damage. There is some, but I cannot imagine that I created that much damage in that particular spot, but, perhaps I did. I must leave a note. Rummaging around in my purse for a pen, I find my epi-pen, a toothbrush, lip sunscreen, a tide to go pen, but no writing pen. I have a box of plastic forks spread all over the floor, a diet coke spewing its contents in the cup holder, several Sonic sacks, a fake silver tray, a 3/4 eaten grilled cheese sandwich, but, no pen. So, I check the glove box. Yes, a pen. Now, for some paper. I opt for tearing a strip off the front page of one of the Contributors on the floor.  I leave a note with my name and cell number, assuring the person that I do have insurance. I notice their license plate says they are from Wisconsin. Welcome to Nashville, Home of the Savvy Drivers.  I then text Mr. L to let him know what has happened, and he responds, "Who is this?"  Funny guy.

So, having taken care of that, I stroll into a busy Apple store where a twelve year old asks several questions, and gives me an appointment to be met in approximately thirty minutes. I thank him, go outside and call my insurance agent to let her know about my little mishap in the garage. She is very nice.

After about 45 minutes, I get a text saying that they are ready for me at the store. I am then directed to the back table on the left where I am told that someone will be with me shortly. A fellow walked up with not-real-clean hair almost to his waist and a six inch gap between the bottom of his shirt and the top of his jeans. He is told that I am his next customer, to which he replies, "let me go wipe the snot off my face."  I kid you not. It must have been a copious amount of snot (hate that word...my mama taught me to say mucous) for he was gone about ten minutes.

As I nauseously wait for his return, hoping he washes his hands after the snot removal, I people watch. I wait and I people watch. Oh, wait, if I had only worn my green spandex sundress with the V down to my navel and my black push up bra, perhaps I would not be waiting here for my customer service rep to wipe the snot off his face, but rather would have numerous reps thinking they could be of service to me, as they seemed to feel compelled to help the little lady in the green dress. When did women start going out with their bras hanging (among other things) out of their dresses. We were taught if your bra strap showed you were a wanton hussy.

Well, it turns out in spite of his unkempt appearance and his questionable health status, he was able to help me. I return to my car. The Wisconsin car is still there. Bless. I decide to go grab a bite to eat at Pei Wei, then get a small dessert at Whole Foods. Walking back to my car, I go into a panic. "Where are the shoes I just bought?  Did I leave them in the restaurant, or at the cash register where I picked up a little gift, or Whole Foods? Where are this shoes?  Oh, wait. They are in the car. I drove over here between buying them and eating lunch."  I seriously need to get home!!

Tomorrow, I am going on a little staycation with two friends. We are meeting for lunch, checking into a hotel in Franklin, attending a play, having supper, spending the night, having breakfast, shopping, lunch, maybe hit a movie, maybe have dinner before we go our separate ways home. I am looking forward to it. I hope they do not mind looking after me, for it is obvious that I need a keeper.

For today, I wish you good friends, minor inconveniences, and I wish you

Blessings

Monday, June 8, 2015

Heroes ~ Possibly an Ill-Advised Blog~ But, Oh, Well

FB has been rife with definitions of heroes lately.  Some see Bruce Jenner as a hero, others do not.  I guess it depends, as do most things, on one's own life experiences.   I assume those who have struggled with gender confusion are grateful for what they see as his courage.  Those who have not faced that particular challenge possibly find him a freak. Life's struggles seem to color how we view most every action of others.

Many arguments have been made by those who claim Christ.  Again, personal filters determine if these people indeed should be called followers of Christ; if any of us should  Just the mere mention that someone claims to be a believer causes others to immediately discount what is being said.  They find belief in a higher being to be superstition and the folly of an ignorant mind.  Often those who believe find non-believers evil and people to be avoided.  I wonder what would happen if we all just loved. 

The most frustrating argument I have seen for why Bruce Jenner is not a hero and is someone who should be shunned, is the comment "God doesn't make mistakes."  I believe the comment, but as an argument for why Bruce Jenner was born a man and that is that, it is ludicrous, in my opinion.  As always, my opinion is all I have here.  My daughter is a PCICU nurse.  If you do not know what that means, it is a Pediatric Cardiac Intensive Care Unit; children with heart problems not caused by choices they have made.  The mere fact that we need PCICUs is evidence enough for me that people are not born as they should be; that God does not orchestrate those events.  Stuff happens.  Babies being born with half a heart, suffering untold pain and multiple surgeries to only die before their first birthdays, is not of God.  It is not.  If you think it is, you and I believe in very different Gods. 

Pictures have been posted on FB of wounded soldiers with artificial limbs, or carrying a fellow soldier off the battlefield as the example of true heroes.  I agree.  These are heroes.  I cannot imagine the courage of marching into the hell of war.  Yes, they are heroes.  I long for the day when those kinds of heroes are not necessary.  Will there be a day when world leaders heroically find the courage of another way; a way other than young people witnessing and doing what no human should have to witness or do?   That would be a hero.

I was gratified to see pictures posted of Mother Teresa as a hero.  Truly, she had a heroic spirit.  I saw another picture of a fireman carrying a baby from a burning building.  Again, this is courage that I cannot fathom. 

Heroes come in all shapes and sizes.  They accomplish many things.  People who work to care for their families, who put their own needs aside to care for those around them, who get up every morning in pain from disease or injury and serve someone else, who do their jobs to the best of their abilities and give a day's work for a day's pay, who sit up nights rocking sick babies, who arrive where they say they will when they say they will, who stand up for the kid being bullied at school, who shut their mouths; heroes all.  My friend, Darrel, whose memorial service we attended yesterday, often said to his family, "real men show up." 

Heroes show up, in countless ways.  There is not one way to be a hero.  Others do not define who my heroes are.  I just want to try to be a hero to those in my little corner of the world, so that when I leave, it will be a little bit better than when I arrived.

So, today I wish you to be heroic in whatever arena you find yourself, I wish you heroes in your life, and I wish you

blessings 

Sunday, June 7, 2015

Circles

Two events I attended today. One was the wedding shower of a beautiful young woman about to embark on a new phase of life. Her life is not about to begin. She has lived a very productive life up until now. She is well-educated, has a good job literally saving lives and enjoys the company of family and good friends.  Her life has not been "on hold" up until this moment in time, yet, her life as a wife, as the other half of a couple is about to begin.  Her life is changing.

The second event was the memorial service for a wonderfully kind and sweet man. He was a husband, father, grandfather, son, uncle, brother, teacher, mentor, and friend.  His wife's life is not about to end, though she may have moments where she thinks it is. She asked me yesterday, "how do I go from being 'we' to being 'me?'  Her life as half of a couple has ended; at least on this earth it has ended. It ended much too soon. Her life has changed.

At the memorial service a picture of nineteen people was projected on the screen. Nineteen people bound together in love and family because a girl caught a boy's eye and he asked to walk with her across campus.  I wonder how many relationships will be created as a result of that other young couple's commitment to merging their lives for a portion of their earthly journey.  I hope they will be as wonderfully joyful and rewarding as for those nineteen. One woman is looking forward, one looks back.

Each woman is facing a new normal in this life. One with much joy and enthusiasm, brimming with great hope for a beautiful future. The other after 46 years of life creating memories, shared jokes, struggles, and triumphs, wondering how she will navigate alone.  Both step out into the unknown.

I do not know if these women have ever met. I do know that neither travels alone into these new worlds upon which they embark. They are both dearly loved, and there are many who stand with them to offer that which is needed. Today, I have prayed blessings on them both.